Post by cellogal on Aug 21, 2008 18:48:07 GMT -5
October 30, 1938
Living room. A radio plays Artie Shaw’s “Begin the Beguine ,” and a blonde woman backs away in fright, asking an unseen someone to please not hurt her. We then pan to the someone, who’s actually a little boy in a Frankenstein mask, approaching her and growling as menacingly as a little boy can. He then trips over something, and the blonde goes instantly from Damsel In Distress to Concerned Mom, laughingly asking her son if he’s all right. He’s fine, but protests that it’s not funny. The mask takes away his peripheral vision, he says. Mom reassures her son, the curiously-named Dobber, that she’ll cut the eye holes bigger, and he’ll still have the best costume tomorrow. The door opens then, and Dobber excitedly calls for Pop. Dobber announces that he’s going to be Frankenstein for Halloween; Pop proclaims this swell, then tells his wife she looks beautiful and asks if supper’s ready. She needs twenty more minutes, then asks him how work was. This whole scene is somewhat stilted and entirely too perfect.
The clock strikes then; Dobber anxiously announces that they’re missing the Edgar Bergen Show, and Mom tells him to go put it on. He scampers off just as Mom hands Pop a cocktail. The show is interrupted by a news broadcast, saying an observatory in Chicago has noted several large explosions of incandescent gas occurring at regular intervals. Some time later, the broadcast is still going on, and the alarmed family listens as the announcer describes monsters and UFOs and other creepy phenomena. Still later, we hear screams from the radio, and Dobber’s scared by this point. Mom tries to comfort him. Even later, Pop paces nervously while Mom and Dobber sit and listen to increasingly terrifying reports of dead state troopers and the like. Finally, the announcer has grave news: they’ve determined that the strange beings are, in fact, an invading army from Mars. Pop looks outside to see emergency vehicles sweeping by on the streets.
Suddenly, the phone rings. Pop, whose name is the no less curious Felton, answers it, and learns from a neighbor that the Martians are only a mile away. Mom announces that they have to go, and instructs Dobber to get his coat. Felton asks where the car keys are; they’re in his pocket, Mom says, then hurries upstairs to pack. Dobber asks where Lucky is; they can’t leave without him. Dad insists that the dog will be fine; Mom says she’ll get him. She brushes past them to go outside, calling instructions for Felton to get Dobber’s things; she’ll be right back.
The next day, a paperboy’s announcing that Martians took Audrey Metz, with Missing posters of our blonde mom up on tree trunks.
We then see Audrey’s lifeless body lying among the scattered autumn leaves.
Present day
Scotty and Lilly approach the scene, fighting through a swarm of media. “Those yo-yos are up early,” Scotty remarks. Lilly asks if they’ve found Hoffa; not quite, Stillman says. It’s a deceased female with a broken bone that indicates strangulation, and he adds that the body’s been down there for over fifty years: coins in her purse were all dated in the 1930s. Lilly observes a pair of gloves monogrammed with “A. W. M.” and guesses that those are the victim’s initials; Stillman says he ran them against records of missing persons from the ‘30s, then asks Scotty and Lilly if they believe in Martians. Well, that’s a random question. Lilly figures out what he’s getting at, though, and asks him if they’ve found that woman who disappeared in the ‘30s. Indeed they have: Audrey W. Metz. It was the end of the world, he says. Lilly tells him that her grandmother was eight, and said she had nightmares for over a year. Our resident History Dunce has no idea what they’re talking about, so Stillman and Lilly fill him in: Orson Welles did a radio broadcast of War of the Worlds, only he made it seem like a news report. Millions believed it, mass panic ensued, Audrey disappeared that night, and the legend began. Lots of crazy rumors sprang up, including abduction by aliens or Germans (not sure which I’d have been more scared of at that point), and there were Audrey Metz sightings for the next twenty years: scuba diving in Jamaica, or working as a spy in Berlin. “People got way too much time on their hands,” Scotty remarks, and I’m inclined to agree with him. Lilly realizes that, though stories had Audrey traveling far and wide, she never made it out of Philly.
Credits.
Squad room. Vera still can’t believe nobody knew it was a prank, but Stillman blames the power of radio. Back then, he says, it was people’s only news source. “Back when the news wasn’t all about the latest starlet’s drunk driving arrest,” Lilly snarks. Hee. Stillman says he and his wife heard it over the car radio, and all they could think about was to get home to see their children before the final attack. Wait. Back up. Is he reminiscing, or is he reading from the report he’s got in his hand? He’d almost have to be reading, because if he and his wife heard it on the car radio, in 1938, that’d mean Stillman would HAVE to be at least, like…eighty. No WAY is he that old. Anyway, while I’m puzzling over that, Lilly’s busy reading about churches holding End of the World prayer meetings, and Vera’s telling an anecdote about a guy who heard the news post-shower and drove all night from New York to Florida in a towel to see his fiancée. “Suddenly everything precious in life became crystal clear,” Lilly’s Voice of Experience tells us. “Who do you want to be with when the world ends?” Stillman wonders aloud. “I wanna be with the guy that knows it’s a hoax,” Vera replies. Hey, I’m SO with Vera on that.
Stillman explains that Audrey was a 33-year-old housewife, with a husband, Felton, and an eight-year-old son, Robert. Lilly says that the family was packing to go, and Audrey went out to get the dog and never returned. Vera adds that the cops had no leads. Jeffries comes up then with a torn movie ticket found in Audrey’s purse, expressing some curiosity over the fact that Audrey’s hitting the movies at the end of the world. “Maybe the usher did it,” Vera suggests drily. Heh. Jeffries points out handwriting on the back: “AYS.” Vera thinks they might be more initials; Stillman theorizes that maybe they’re the second half of a word, and Lilly says it might be part of an address. Stillman sends Vera off with Kat to St. Luke’s Hospital to visit with Elmer Gibbins, a guy who keeps calling and saying he knows who did it. Vera asks if Elmer’s the same guy that saw her in Germany. Heh. Stillman instructs the others to meet with any of the family still in town.
Metz home. Dobber tells Scotty and Lilly that, when he was little, he liked to think all those rumors about his mom living someplace exotic were true; she used to read adventure stories to him, he says, and he always hoped she was off on one of her own. Awww. Lilly asks if he noticed anything different about Audrey’s behavior before she disappeared; he insists his mom was very happy, then shows them a picture of the family with their car. Scotty, redeeming himself from his earlier History Duncery by pulling out his Car Whiz-ness, identifies the car as a Hudson. Dobber confirms it, saying it’s a 1930 model. Scotty says he saw one of those at a classic car show a few years back; a guy was asking $40,000 for it. Wow. Dobber’s equally amazed, saying he thinks theirs cost $600, a lot of money in the Depression. “Especially with your dad out of work for three years,” Lilly comments, and Dobber nods. Scotty asks if that put a strain on the marriage, and Dobber says it did, but they loved each other. Scotty points out that sometimes love’s not enough, and thinks maybe Audrey chose that night to split. Dobber insists that his mom would never abandon him.
Kitchen table, where we hear Benny Goodman’s “You Can’t Pull The Wool Over My Eyes.” Audrey’s serving dinner, and Dobber’s asking Felton why we were so mad at the Indians; weren’t they here first? Why, yes. Yes, they were. Felton asks for his glasses, then tells Dobber not to ask strange questions at the table. Audrey tells him to put the book away; it’s time to eat. Dobber’s not thrilled that they’re having soup again. Felton scolds him to stop complaining, but Dobber protests that it doesn’t make him full, and he gets tummy aches at night. Awww. My heartstrings are officially tugged. Apparently, Audrey’s are, too, because she gives Dobber her bread, then asks Felton if work is picking up. “Any day now,” Felton says. Audrey reminds him, as sweetly as she can, that they have bills to pay in the meantime, but Felton ignores her, instructing Dobber to fetch him some water. Fetch? He’s not a dog, Pops. Dobber obeys, and Felton demands to know what Audrey thinks she’s doing; they don’t discuss these things in front of Dobber. Audrey asks him when they’ll discuss them, then tells him they’re in trouble. Felton’s confident things will pick up. Audrey insists he can’t keep putting on a suit and tie and going to an empty office; Felton argues that it’s his job. Audrey tells him that they’re down to pennies and tentatively suggests that maybe it’s time they found other work. She starts to tell him about the WPA, but Felton won’t hear of it. They’ll have him digging ditches, he says. Audrey protests that, if it means putting food in Dobber’s stomach, so be it. I’m totally with her on this one. She says that Dobber’s wasting away, but Felton doesn’t care about that so much as he cares about not becoming a “pampered poverty rat.” “What will the neighbors think?” he says. Oooh, I SO wanna smack this guy. Audrey doesn’t care what the neighbors think. He argues that he has a reputation; she says the neighbors aren’t interested in reputations. She points out one neighbor who killed himself after the stock market crash, and another who’s selling apples, but Felton’s done discussing the matter. He calmly asks Audrey to pass the salt.
Scotty says it sounds like the marriage was strained, and Dobber says it was just the Depression talking. Lilly asks if the fights ever escalated, and Dobber insists he was with his dad that night; they drove around looking for Audrey until sunrise. Scotty understands that Felton lives there with Dobber, and Dobber says his dad’s got Alzheimer’s. That should put a monkey wrench in things, but I have a strange feeling it probably won’t. Lilly, undeterred, asks if they can talk to him. Dobber says they’re welcome to try.
Felton’s room. “Hello, Aud,” Felton says to Lilly, then asks her if she’s seen his glasses, and tells her she looks beautiful this morning. Lilly introduces herself and Scotty, and Scotty says they’d like to talk to him about the night Audrey disappeared. “What time’s supper?” Felton asks in response. Scotty asks Felton if he remembers the War of the Worlds broadcast, and I’m totally expecting him not to, but, conveniently enough, he does. He remembers the Martians, the date, and the fact that Dobber was going to be Frankenstein for Halloween. No. Way. He says they searched all night for Audrey, and then he got the news…
Street. Mass hysteria ensues, and then the radio announcer says that they can now confirm that the Martian landing was a hoax. The governor even said so!
Felton says they really thought it was the end of the world. “Orson Welles…what a son of a b*tch,” he remarks. Hee. He then turns to Lilly. “Hello, Aud,” he says. “Have you seen my glasses?”
St. Luke’s Hospital. Kat tells Vera that Elmer just had hip replacement surgery, and claims he saw Audrey back in the day. “Doin’ what, scuba divin’?” Vera asks. Hee. He then finds himself face to face with none other than Toni. They exchange pleasantries, and Vera re-introduces Toni to Kat, who then tells Vera she’ll be down the hall. (Or, to quote Grey’s Anatomy: “I’m going to leave the room for a period of time for no reason whatsoever.”) Exit Kat, enter Extreme Awkwardness. Vera explains he’s there interviewing a witness; after an uncomfortable pause, Toni tells him not to let her keep him. She’s not. He asks her how she’s been; good, she says, then tells him she doesn’t see him much around the building. He’s busy: people keep killing each other. Hee. She’s the same: people keep getting sick. “Never changes,” Vera observes. “Nothing ever does,” Toni replies. They look at each other for a moment, and then Toni tells him it’s good to see him; he smiles, tells her to take care, and walks off, then stops and looks back over his shoulder, but she’s disappeared. Awwwww, Vera.
Elmer’s room. He can’t believe they finally found Audrey. Kat asks if he knew her well; he saw her once a week at the Sixth Street bread line; a real nice lady, he said. He then remarks that he always thought they’d be too clever to get caught. “They?” Vera asks blankly. “The FBI, dipstick,” is Elmer’s response. Heeeee. He explains, in a tone that indicates he can’t believe how dumb they are, that Audrey knew they were coming.
Bread line, where Count Basie’s “Jumpin’ at the Woodside” plays. Audrey laments that the door should have opened an hour ago; Elmer replies that all they’ve got is time; waiting is as close as he’s got to a purpose. Audrey has to get home; Dobber’s sick. Elmer, concerned, asks if Dobber’s getting any meat or fruit. “Only when he dreams about it,” Audrey replies sadly. She says the best part of her day used to be waking him up; he’d sleep with a smile, and wake up with a joke or a funny dream, but now…she likes to let him sleep in. A man comes up then, greets Audrey, and tells her she’s too beautiful for this much sorrow. Audrey shyly thanks him, and he tells her to come to Fifth and Diamond; handing her a piece of paper, he says that hers will be the prettiest taxi. She doesn’t understand, but the guy assures her he only picks a chosen few. He then bids her good day and walks off. Hmmm…maybe HE’S a Martian.
Kat asks Elmer if he has any idea what that guy meant by “prettiest taxi;” Elmer’s sure it’s some kind of government code. Vera asks if the man said he was with the FBI. “Of course he didn’t say it,” Elmer replies. “He was an undercover agent, not a moron.” Hee. I really like Elmer. “Is this guy new?” he asks Kat incredulously, pointing at Vera. “Total rookie,” Kat deadpans. “Figures,” Elmer replies. And my Elmer love continues to grow. He then explains that Audrey was picked special; the FBI knew that the Martians were coming, but the Martians got to her before she could run. Then, the FBI covered it over. “Right,” Kat replies, in the exact tone you’d expect from someone humoring the theories of a possibly delusional, but highly entertaining, old man.
Hospital hallway. Vera asks if Stillman’s punishing them or something. “Told you not to steal his paper clips,” Kat retorts. Heee. Vera spies Toni then; she seems to be flirting with this hospital’s version of Dr. McDreamy, and Kat asks Vera if he misses her. He doesn’t even think about it. Oooh, you’re SO lying. Kat agrees with me, only her response is better. “You expect me to believe that, dipstick?” she asks him. Heh. This episode is seriously cracking me up.
Squad room. Jeffries and Stillman are going over Audrey sightings; Jeffries is particularly amused by one who claimed to have seen Audrey jogging with Hitler in Fairmount Park. “Let me guess,” Stillman says drily. “She’s alive and wants to make a statement.” Indeed she does. Jeffries says she called ten minutes ago. Heh. Kat jitterbugs her way in then, asking Stillman if he wants to dance; ten cents gets him a song. “Oh, this better be good,” Stillman says, unable to keep his I’m The Boss Straight Face on any longer. Kat then explains that Fifth and Diamond was the scene of the Palomar Ballroom in 1938, a dance hall where a lot of young women worked as taxi dancers. Kat says the guy who runs it now is a real history buff, then says that the ticket found in Audrey’s purse wasn’t a movie ticket, but a dance ticket. Jeffries explains that the length of the dance depended on the amount the guy paid, like a taxi ride. Makes sense. Kat proclaims this a G-rated version of a lap dance, then says that the former owner, Buzz Moran, died in 1972. Jeffries realizes that Buzz was recruiting Audrey, and Kat concludes that the ticket says she took the job. Stillman says this opens up a whole new world of suspects, and Kat’s money says the killer was a client. Wonder what Elmer would have to say to that!
Living room. An old woman, Penny, fondly remembers the Palomar Ballroom, saying that feels like a hundred years ago, then asks Scotty and Kat how they found her. Kat explains that the Palomar had photos, and Scotty adds that she’s the only one they’ve found. “You mean I’m the only one still alive,” Penny says, then looks at the photo, not able to imagine being that young. Kat tells her that they’re investigating the murder of Audrey Metz; Scotty says they think she was a dancer there. Penny tells them she read about Audrey in the papers, and Kat asks if she knew Audrey at the club. “Oh, you betcha, by golly,” Penny says. Hee. She explains that they got to be very close. Scotty observes that Audrey didn’t seem to fit the profile of a dancer, and Penny says that most of them were working class girls who wanted to dance professionally or be in the movies. “Not many moms,” Kat surmises, and Penny confirms this. Scotty says he heard cops were called into the Palomar a lot in those days to break up fights, and Penny agrees that it could be a rough and tumble place, attracting a lot of dangerous types. Kat asks how Audrey handled it, and Penny says she was a different class of gal who had trouble with the tough customers.
Palomar. Buzz takes tickets as Audrey walks into the ballroom, takes in all the other dancers, and then spies a man sitting alone at a table. Women cluster in a corner and take tickets. Penny notices Audrey and bounces up to her, introducing herself, and tells Audrey she’ll love it there. Audrey says it’s just temporary until her family gets back on its feet, then asks if they just stand and wait. Penny enthuses that they don’t wait, they advertise, then shrugs out of her wrap. Audrey, uncomfortably, asks Penny what to do if they touch you where they’re not invited. Penny tells her not to worry, since most of them are okay Joes, and that’s how she met her fiancé. She spies him across the room, whistles at him, and blows him a kiss. He returns it, and beckons her over, and Penny tells Audrey that Toms ain’t that bad; there’s good if you know where to look. “You think so?” Audrey asks. “You betcha, by golly,” Penny says, then flounces off to dance.
Buzz takes the stage and announces that the band will play a slow one, called “Always,” and as Ralph Flanagan’s song begins to play, a sailor, possibly some ancestor of Joey Tribbiani, asks Audrey how she’s doin’ and hands her a ticket. She nervously begins to dance with him, but his hands rapidly begin to wander where they’re not invited. She classily informs him that his ticket doesn’t pay for that. He asks her what does, then hits on her in crude 1930s slang. She tells him to go to Hell, he urges her to relax and offers to buy her some giggle water. The guy who’s been sitting at the table all this time has had enough; he tells her to take a rest, since the lady seems tired. The sailor shoves him and tells him to mind his own beeswax. “You drunk, stupid, or both?” the guy asks calmly. Hee. The sailor challenges him to talk outside, but then one of his buddies comes up and whispers in his ear. The sailor then apologizes and backs off, and Audrey thanks the guy, who goes back to sitting at his table.
Penny says that Buzz gave that sailor a talking-to, and he shipped out the next day anyway. Scotty asks who the knight in shining armor was, and she tells him it was Will Paige. He’d sit in the dark and stare at Audrey, night after night. She explains that Will was this lonesome rich guy with nothing to lose, but he gave her the heebie-jeebies; he was violent, she says. Rumor was, he quit the booze because he got in a drunken fight and killed a guy.
Living room. A radio plays Artie Shaw’s “Begin the Beguine ,” and a blonde woman backs away in fright, asking an unseen someone to please not hurt her. We then pan to the someone, who’s actually a little boy in a Frankenstein mask, approaching her and growling as menacingly as a little boy can. He then trips over something, and the blonde goes instantly from Damsel In Distress to Concerned Mom, laughingly asking her son if he’s all right. He’s fine, but protests that it’s not funny. The mask takes away his peripheral vision, he says. Mom reassures her son, the curiously-named Dobber, that she’ll cut the eye holes bigger, and he’ll still have the best costume tomorrow. The door opens then, and Dobber excitedly calls for Pop. Dobber announces that he’s going to be Frankenstein for Halloween; Pop proclaims this swell, then tells his wife she looks beautiful and asks if supper’s ready. She needs twenty more minutes, then asks him how work was. This whole scene is somewhat stilted and entirely too perfect.
The clock strikes then; Dobber anxiously announces that they’re missing the Edgar Bergen Show, and Mom tells him to go put it on. He scampers off just as Mom hands Pop a cocktail. The show is interrupted by a news broadcast, saying an observatory in Chicago has noted several large explosions of incandescent gas occurring at regular intervals. Some time later, the broadcast is still going on, and the alarmed family listens as the announcer describes monsters and UFOs and other creepy phenomena. Still later, we hear screams from the radio, and Dobber’s scared by this point. Mom tries to comfort him. Even later, Pop paces nervously while Mom and Dobber sit and listen to increasingly terrifying reports of dead state troopers and the like. Finally, the announcer has grave news: they’ve determined that the strange beings are, in fact, an invading army from Mars. Pop looks outside to see emergency vehicles sweeping by on the streets.
Suddenly, the phone rings. Pop, whose name is the no less curious Felton, answers it, and learns from a neighbor that the Martians are only a mile away. Mom announces that they have to go, and instructs Dobber to get his coat. Felton asks where the car keys are; they’re in his pocket, Mom says, then hurries upstairs to pack. Dobber asks where Lucky is; they can’t leave without him. Dad insists that the dog will be fine; Mom says she’ll get him. She brushes past them to go outside, calling instructions for Felton to get Dobber’s things; she’ll be right back.
The next day, a paperboy’s announcing that Martians took Audrey Metz, with Missing posters of our blonde mom up on tree trunks.
We then see Audrey’s lifeless body lying among the scattered autumn leaves.
Present day
Scotty and Lilly approach the scene, fighting through a swarm of media. “Those yo-yos are up early,” Scotty remarks. Lilly asks if they’ve found Hoffa; not quite, Stillman says. It’s a deceased female with a broken bone that indicates strangulation, and he adds that the body’s been down there for over fifty years: coins in her purse were all dated in the 1930s. Lilly observes a pair of gloves monogrammed with “A. W. M.” and guesses that those are the victim’s initials; Stillman says he ran them against records of missing persons from the ‘30s, then asks Scotty and Lilly if they believe in Martians. Well, that’s a random question. Lilly figures out what he’s getting at, though, and asks him if they’ve found that woman who disappeared in the ‘30s. Indeed they have: Audrey W. Metz. It was the end of the world, he says. Lilly tells him that her grandmother was eight, and said she had nightmares for over a year. Our resident History Dunce has no idea what they’re talking about, so Stillman and Lilly fill him in: Orson Welles did a radio broadcast of War of the Worlds, only he made it seem like a news report. Millions believed it, mass panic ensued, Audrey disappeared that night, and the legend began. Lots of crazy rumors sprang up, including abduction by aliens or Germans (not sure which I’d have been more scared of at that point), and there were Audrey Metz sightings for the next twenty years: scuba diving in Jamaica, or working as a spy in Berlin. “People got way too much time on their hands,” Scotty remarks, and I’m inclined to agree with him. Lilly realizes that, though stories had Audrey traveling far and wide, she never made it out of Philly.
Credits.
Squad room. Vera still can’t believe nobody knew it was a prank, but Stillman blames the power of radio. Back then, he says, it was people’s only news source. “Back when the news wasn’t all about the latest starlet’s drunk driving arrest,” Lilly snarks. Hee. Stillman says he and his wife heard it over the car radio, and all they could think about was to get home to see their children before the final attack. Wait. Back up. Is he reminiscing, or is he reading from the report he’s got in his hand? He’d almost have to be reading, because if he and his wife heard it on the car radio, in 1938, that’d mean Stillman would HAVE to be at least, like…eighty. No WAY is he that old. Anyway, while I’m puzzling over that, Lilly’s busy reading about churches holding End of the World prayer meetings, and Vera’s telling an anecdote about a guy who heard the news post-shower and drove all night from New York to Florida in a towel to see his fiancée. “Suddenly everything precious in life became crystal clear,” Lilly’s Voice of Experience tells us. “Who do you want to be with when the world ends?” Stillman wonders aloud. “I wanna be with the guy that knows it’s a hoax,” Vera replies. Hey, I’m SO with Vera on that.
Stillman explains that Audrey was a 33-year-old housewife, with a husband, Felton, and an eight-year-old son, Robert. Lilly says that the family was packing to go, and Audrey went out to get the dog and never returned. Vera adds that the cops had no leads. Jeffries comes up then with a torn movie ticket found in Audrey’s purse, expressing some curiosity over the fact that Audrey’s hitting the movies at the end of the world. “Maybe the usher did it,” Vera suggests drily. Heh. Jeffries points out handwriting on the back: “AYS.” Vera thinks they might be more initials; Stillman theorizes that maybe they’re the second half of a word, and Lilly says it might be part of an address. Stillman sends Vera off with Kat to St. Luke’s Hospital to visit with Elmer Gibbins, a guy who keeps calling and saying he knows who did it. Vera asks if Elmer’s the same guy that saw her in Germany. Heh. Stillman instructs the others to meet with any of the family still in town.
Metz home. Dobber tells Scotty and Lilly that, when he was little, he liked to think all those rumors about his mom living someplace exotic were true; she used to read adventure stories to him, he says, and he always hoped she was off on one of her own. Awww. Lilly asks if he noticed anything different about Audrey’s behavior before she disappeared; he insists his mom was very happy, then shows them a picture of the family with their car. Scotty, redeeming himself from his earlier History Duncery by pulling out his Car Whiz-ness, identifies the car as a Hudson. Dobber confirms it, saying it’s a 1930 model. Scotty says he saw one of those at a classic car show a few years back; a guy was asking $40,000 for it. Wow. Dobber’s equally amazed, saying he thinks theirs cost $600, a lot of money in the Depression. “Especially with your dad out of work for three years,” Lilly comments, and Dobber nods. Scotty asks if that put a strain on the marriage, and Dobber says it did, but they loved each other. Scotty points out that sometimes love’s not enough, and thinks maybe Audrey chose that night to split. Dobber insists that his mom would never abandon him.
Kitchen table, where we hear Benny Goodman’s “You Can’t Pull The Wool Over My Eyes.” Audrey’s serving dinner, and Dobber’s asking Felton why we were so mad at the Indians; weren’t they here first? Why, yes. Yes, they were. Felton asks for his glasses, then tells Dobber not to ask strange questions at the table. Audrey tells him to put the book away; it’s time to eat. Dobber’s not thrilled that they’re having soup again. Felton scolds him to stop complaining, but Dobber protests that it doesn’t make him full, and he gets tummy aches at night. Awww. My heartstrings are officially tugged. Apparently, Audrey’s are, too, because she gives Dobber her bread, then asks Felton if work is picking up. “Any day now,” Felton says. Audrey reminds him, as sweetly as she can, that they have bills to pay in the meantime, but Felton ignores her, instructing Dobber to fetch him some water. Fetch? He’s not a dog, Pops. Dobber obeys, and Felton demands to know what Audrey thinks she’s doing; they don’t discuss these things in front of Dobber. Audrey asks him when they’ll discuss them, then tells him they’re in trouble. Felton’s confident things will pick up. Audrey insists he can’t keep putting on a suit and tie and going to an empty office; Felton argues that it’s his job. Audrey tells him that they’re down to pennies and tentatively suggests that maybe it’s time they found other work. She starts to tell him about the WPA, but Felton won’t hear of it. They’ll have him digging ditches, he says. Audrey protests that, if it means putting food in Dobber’s stomach, so be it. I’m totally with her on this one. She says that Dobber’s wasting away, but Felton doesn’t care about that so much as he cares about not becoming a “pampered poverty rat.” “What will the neighbors think?” he says. Oooh, I SO wanna smack this guy. Audrey doesn’t care what the neighbors think. He argues that he has a reputation; she says the neighbors aren’t interested in reputations. She points out one neighbor who killed himself after the stock market crash, and another who’s selling apples, but Felton’s done discussing the matter. He calmly asks Audrey to pass the salt.
Scotty says it sounds like the marriage was strained, and Dobber says it was just the Depression talking. Lilly asks if the fights ever escalated, and Dobber insists he was with his dad that night; they drove around looking for Audrey until sunrise. Scotty understands that Felton lives there with Dobber, and Dobber says his dad’s got Alzheimer’s. That should put a monkey wrench in things, but I have a strange feeling it probably won’t. Lilly, undeterred, asks if they can talk to him. Dobber says they’re welcome to try.
Felton’s room. “Hello, Aud,” Felton says to Lilly, then asks her if she’s seen his glasses, and tells her she looks beautiful this morning. Lilly introduces herself and Scotty, and Scotty says they’d like to talk to him about the night Audrey disappeared. “What time’s supper?” Felton asks in response. Scotty asks Felton if he remembers the War of the Worlds broadcast, and I’m totally expecting him not to, but, conveniently enough, he does. He remembers the Martians, the date, and the fact that Dobber was going to be Frankenstein for Halloween. No. Way. He says they searched all night for Audrey, and then he got the news…
Street. Mass hysteria ensues, and then the radio announcer says that they can now confirm that the Martian landing was a hoax. The governor even said so!
Felton says they really thought it was the end of the world. “Orson Welles…what a son of a b*tch,” he remarks. Hee. He then turns to Lilly. “Hello, Aud,” he says. “Have you seen my glasses?”
St. Luke’s Hospital. Kat tells Vera that Elmer just had hip replacement surgery, and claims he saw Audrey back in the day. “Doin’ what, scuba divin’?” Vera asks. Hee. He then finds himself face to face with none other than Toni. They exchange pleasantries, and Vera re-introduces Toni to Kat, who then tells Vera she’ll be down the hall. (Or, to quote Grey’s Anatomy: “I’m going to leave the room for a period of time for no reason whatsoever.”) Exit Kat, enter Extreme Awkwardness. Vera explains he’s there interviewing a witness; after an uncomfortable pause, Toni tells him not to let her keep him. She’s not. He asks her how she’s been; good, she says, then tells him she doesn’t see him much around the building. He’s busy: people keep killing each other. Hee. She’s the same: people keep getting sick. “Never changes,” Vera observes. “Nothing ever does,” Toni replies. They look at each other for a moment, and then Toni tells him it’s good to see him; he smiles, tells her to take care, and walks off, then stops and looks back over his shoulder, but she’s disappeared. Awwwww, Vera.
Elmer’s room. He can’t believe they finally found Audrey. Kat asks if he knew her well; he saw her once a week at the Sixth Street bread line; a real nice lady, he said. He then remarks that he always thought they’d be too clever to get caught. “They?” Vera asks blankly. “The FBI, dipstick,” is Elmer’s response. Heeeee. He explains, in a tone that indicates he can’t believe how dumb they are, that Audrey knew they were coming.
Bread line, where Count Basie’s “Jumpin’ at the Woodside” plays. Audrey laments that the door should have opened an hour ago; Elmer replies that all they’ve got is time; waiting is as close as he’s got to a purpose. Audrey has to get home; Dobber’s sick. Elmer, concerned, asks if Dobber’s getting any meat or fruit. “Only when he dreams about it,” Audrey replies sadly. She says the best part of her day used to be waking him up; he’d sleep with a smile, and wake up with a joke or a funny dream, but now…she likes to let him sleep in. A man comes up then, greets Audrey, and tells her she’s too beautiful for this much sorrow. Audrey shyly thanks him, and he tells her to come to Fifth and Diamond; handing her a piece of paper, he says that hers will be the prettiest taxi. She doesn’t understand, but the guy assures her he only picks a chosen few. He then bids her good day and walks off. Hmmm…maybe HE’S a Martian.
Kat asks Elmer if he has any idea what that guy meant by “prettiest taxi;” Elmer’s sure it’s some kind of government code. Vera asks if the man said he was with the FBI. “Of course he didn’t say it,” Elmer replies. “He was an undercover agent, not a moron.” Hee. I really like Elmer. “Is this guy new?” he asks Kat incredulously, pointing at Vera. “Total rookie,” Kat deadpans. “Figures,” Elmer replies. And my Elmer love continues to grow. He then explains that Audrey was picked special; the FBI knew that the Martians were coming, but the Martians got to her before she could run. Then, the FBI covered it over. “Right,” Kat replies, in the exact tone you’d expect from someone humoring the theories of a possibly delusional, but highly entertaining, old man.
Hospital hallway. Vera asks if Stillman’s punishing them or something. “Told you not to steal his paper clips,” Kat retorts. Heee. Vera spies Toni then; she seems to be flirting with this hospital’s version of Dr. McDreamy, and Kat asks Vera if he misses her. He doesn’t even think about it. Oooh, you’re SO lying. Kat agrees with me, only her response is better. “You expect me to believe that, dipstick?” she asks him. Heh. This episode is seriously cracking me up.
Squad room. Jeffries and Stillman are going over Audrey sightings; Jeffries is particularly amused by one who claimed to have seen Audrey jogging with Hitler in Fairmount Park. “Let me guess,” Stillman says drily. “She’s alive and wants to make a statement.” Indeed she does. Jeffries says she called ten minutes ago. Heh. Kat jitterbugs her way in then, asking Stillman if he wants to dance; ten cents gets him a song. “Oh, this better be good,” Stillman says, unable to keep his I’m The Boss Straight Face on any longer. Kat then explains that Fifth and Diamond was the scene of the Palomar Ballroom in 1938, a dance hall where a lot of young women worked as taxi dancers. Kat says the guy who runs it now is a real history buff, then says that the ticket found in Audrey’s purse wasn’t a movie ticket, but a dance ticket. Jeffries explains that the length of the dance depended on the amount the guy paid, like a taxi ride. Makes sense. Kat proclaims this a G-rated version of a lap dance, then says that the former owner, Buzz Moran, died in 1972. Jeffries realizes that Buzz was recruiting Audrey, and Kat concludes that the ticket says she took the job. Stillman says this opens up a whole new world of suspects, and Kat’s money says the killer was a client. Wonder what Elmer would have to say to that!
Living room. An old woman, Penny, fondly remembers the Palomar Ballroom, saying that feels like a hundred years ago, then asks Scotty and Kat how they found her. Kat explains that the Palomar had photos, and Scotty adds that she’s the only one they’ve found. “You mean I’m the only one still alive,” Penny says, then looks at the photo, not able to imagine being that young. Kat tells her that they’re investigating the murder of Audrey Metz; Scotty says they think she was a dancer there. Penny tells them she read about Audrey in the papers, and Kat asks if she knew Audrey at the club. “Oh, you betcha, by golly,” Penny says. Hee. She explains that they got to be very close. Scotty observes that Audrey didn’t seem to fit the profile of a dancer, and Penny says that most of them were working class girls who wanted to dance professionally or be in the movies. “Not many moms,” Kat surmises, and Penny confirms this. Scotty says he heard cops were called into the Palomar a lot in those days to break up fights, and Penny agrees that it could be a rough and tumble place, attracting a lot of dangerous types. Kat asks how Audrey handled it, and Penny says she was a different class of gal who had trouble with the tough customers.
Palomar. Buzz takes tickets as Audrey walks into the ballroom, takes in all the other dancers, and then spies a man sitting alone at a table. Women cluster in a corner and take tickets. Penny notices Audrey and bounces up to her, introducing herself, and tells Audrey she’ll love it there. Audrey says it’s just temporary until her family gets back on its feet, then asks if they just stand and wait. Penny enthuses that they don’t wait, they advertise, then shrugs out of her wrap. Audrey, uncomfortably, asks Penny what to do if they touch you where they’re not invited. Penny tells her not to worry, since most of them are okay Joes, and that’s how she met her fiancé. She spies him across the room, whistles at him, and blows him a kiss. He returns it, and beckons her over, and Penny tells Audrey that Toms ain’t that bad; there’s good if you know where to look. “You think so?” Audrey asks. “You betcha, by golly,” Penny says, then flounces off to dance.
Buzz takes the stage and announces that the band will play a slow one, called “Always,” and as Ralph Flanagan’s song begins to play, a sailor, possibly some ancestor of Joey Tribbiani, asks Audrey how she’s doin’ and hands her a ticket. She nervously begins to dance with him, but his hands rapidly begin to wander where they’re not invited. She classily informs him that his ticket doesn’t pay for that. He asks her what does, then hits on her in crude 1930s slang. She tells him to go to Hell, he urges her to relax and offers to buy her some giggle water. The guy who’s been sitting at the table all this time has had enough; he tells her to take a rest, since the lady seems tired. The sailor shoves him and tells him to mind his own beeswax. “You drunk, stupid, or both?” the guy asks calmly. Hee. The sailor challenges him to talk outside, but then one of his buddies comes up and whispers in his ear. The sailor then apologizes and backs off, and Audrey thanks the guy, who goes back to sitting at his table.
Penny says that Buzz gave that sailor a talking-to, and he shipped out the next day anyway. Scotty asks who the knight in shining armor was, and she tells him it was Will Paige. He’d sit in the dark and stare at Audrey, night after night. She explains that Will was this lonesome rich guy with nothing to lose, but he gave her the heebie-jeebies; he was violent, she says. Rumor was, he quit the booze because he got in a drunken fight and killed a guy.
