cellogal
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Post by cellogal on Apr 24, 2008 8:51:32 GMT -5
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Post by lsr on Apr 24, 2008 10:29:30 GMT -5
Oh... cellogal. Wow. I can't begin to describe how much I loved this! I actually came to the Fanfic section to catch up on your other story but found this first. And man, I'm so happy I did!
As you already know, I think this is exactly how Scotty progressed in his thoughts/feelings for her over the years. I just love how you articulate so perfectly the Scotty-esque POV on the subject. Knowing but not knowing at the same time; being in denial about it; trying to admit to himself what they are to each other without really admitting anything. It seems so real and believable the way Scotty would (and most likely has) come to a realization about her. The type of guy that Scotty is, I can't imagine it happening any other way. It's just so well-written and ... perfect - I have no other way to put it. Thank you so much for writing this!
....
Would you take a bribe to write a Lilly one-shot? lol
That's a mean thing to ask of you, I know, since it takes a lot to write such well-thought out stories but if you ever felt inspired, I'd be the first one here.
Great job, again!!
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cellogal
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Post by cellogal on Apr 24, 2008 16:32:41 GMT -5
Wow, thanks, lsr!!! I'm so glad you enjoyed this story! I guess I just got inspired. And if I do get inspired to write a Lil one, I sure will. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts!!!
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Post by TVFan on Apr 25, 2008 15:19:07 GMT -5
This was excellent, cellogal. You really captured Scotty very well. And you left it open in case you decide to add on.  You know, I think the show has done both characters a disservice by not addressing what happened in "Stalker." There needs to be a scene where Lil and Scotty discuss the whole shooting thing because I have a hard time believing that Scotty isn't feeling a huge ping of guilt over the whole thing. Obviously, he shouldn't, but that doesn't mean that he doesn't. They kinda put it out there with the closing scenes of "Stalker" when they showed him pacing outside her hospital room. I thought they were going to do something with it, but it never happened. I hate the way the smaller character stuff gets dropped in favor of the cases. Anyway, I was glad to see you address it here. Stories such as yours allow me to fill in the gaps that the show leaves behind.  |
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cellogal
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Post by cellogal on Apr 26, 2008 7:42:11 GMT -5
Thanks, TVFan! I agree, I think sometimes important character stories are dropped/shortchanged in favor of the cases. I'm dying for them to talk about the shooting, and I still hold out hope that they will on the show, but until then...I'll happily fill in the gaps. Thanks for sharing your thoughts; I'm glad you enjoyed this!
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cellogal
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Post by cellogal on Apr 26, 2008 21:35:10 GMT -5
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Collider
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Post by Collider on Apr 27, 2008 5:34:36 GMT -5
Once again, your capacity for first-person perspective kind of makes me stop and go "whoa" for a few minutes after reading.
As ever, Lilly is a character that very seldom holds my attention, and once again you manage to bypass that rule. In particular, I find it so absolutely fitting (in that wonderfully ironic sort of way) that she figures out Scotty loves her, before she figures out that she loves him. That, for me, is Lilly Rush in a nutshell. She spends an entire chapter thinking about her partner, and it's not until she's analysed him and his feelings to death that she realises she might need to stop and analyse herself too.
While I will be honest and say that I sort of kinda preferred it as a one-shot, I'll also admit that such is probably because the shippiness levels were that little bit lower, and I'm not quite THAT converted yet, and also possibly a knee-jerk reaction on my part to seeing an entire chapter focussing on Lil.
On the whole, though... while I'm still not quite shipperified enough to say "yaymoreshipping!", there can be no denying that - as always seems to be the case with your fic - it's yet another beautifully written and insightful piece. Much more subtle than Scotty's section was, which is absolutely fitting for both of them, and a lot... I can't think of the right word, but the best that's coming to me is "quieter"... than his part. If that makes sense.
As I may have mentioned... once or twice... Lilly really is the hardest person to get inside the head of, and I can only imagine how much more so when you're actually trying to get her to focus on herself for a minute, because she's so bloody resistent. You've managed to pull off that transition, from focusing on Scotty to being forced to focus on herself absolutely effortlessly, so major kudos for that.
I'm sure there would be more, only - as usual! - I've forgotten it. End point, though, another beautifully written piece.
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cellogal
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Post by cellogal on Apr 27, 2008 11:21:53 GMT -5
As ever, thanks, Collider. If I'm being totally honest, I preferred it as a one-shot, too, mostly because it left the door open. I'm more convinced that Show! Scotty has feelings for Lilly more than I'm convinced that Show! Lilly has feelings for Scotty. But...like I said, Lilly made me write it.
I'm glad you enjoyed it, shippy though it was. I didn't set out to write a really, really shippy story, but it looks like this one is going to be anyway. And I've roped myself into at least one more chapter, which should be full of yummy angst and character development. I'm trying not to make this an epic, though.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts!
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Post by lsr on Apr 27, 2008 14:14:52 GMT -5
I'm ...speechless, cellogal. I've read countless fanfics for a myriad of shows and yours are truly the highest on my list out of all of them. I have to be your biggest fan. I don't even think I could do justice by explaining what I love about them. You just have this incredible way of telling a story with such fluency, expression and as Collider mentioned, insight and I constantly find myself in awe of how you can easily make the reader get lost in your words. This chapter was just as amazing as the first; Lilly is so complex and I love the way you interpreted her thoughts and feelings on the things that she just can't seem to find a way to deal with on the show (or at least that we've been allowed to bear witness to). I think you were able to get into her head exceptionally well and really exhibit the only way Lilly would be able to come to any kind of conclusion... about anything - by just thinking for two minutes about it. It's almost like Lilly just doesn't want to let herself go there because it feels to her like she would be 'giving in' or presenting herself as weak if/when she did. I think if she would just recognize that she's just scared to admit what certain things mean, as you were able to have her realize in your story, she might be able to accept love when it comes her way. I also really loved the idea that you had her not realize Scotty was there holding her when she was shot in "Stalker". I can totally see that as being something the Lilly character would simply not register in her mind - being so overwrought with other troubles - she just doesn't seem to notice certain things like that. As a full-blown shipper, this story just makes me want them together and for those realizations to happen soooo much more and so much sooner. Thank you for writing and letting us shippers immerse ourselves in what we don't yet have. I truly think there is hope otherwise I wouldn't be here 23 out of the 24 hours we have in a day but I agree, as we were discussing in the other thread, Lilly's feelings are far more hidden on the show than Scotty's - which is again why you did a fantastic job of bringing them to light and putting them into such eloquence. Sidenote: I hope I didn't force you into writing something you didn't truly feel you wanted to write. I absolutely loved the one-shot but I may have been selfish in wanting more more more. As I said, it was excellent but I certainly hope my request didn't push you to making it into something you didn't want. (wow look at the ego on me!  ) Anyway, I'll shut up now but I just loved this and would never say no to more of anything you write! |
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cellogal
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Post by cellogal on Apr 27, 2008 16:03:54 GMT -5
Hey, thanks, lsr! Don't worry, I didn't feel pressured to write this by anyone other than Lilly. I hadn't intended to write more, but I started digging around in Lilly's head, and the next thing I knew, there was this chapter, and I'm thinking, okay, wow, I kind of have to post that. I'm trying to keep this from becoming a full-blown epic, and I'm hoping I can wrap it up in just one more chapter, but we'll see how that goes.
And, thanks for the praise! I'm so glad I have fans! (squee). I've never had fans of my writing before, mostly because I've never really shared it with anybody before. So this is fun. And Lilly is complex, so it's always a big, big relief to know that I did her some kind of justice after I've written a Lilly-centric chapter. Scotty is so much easier for me to write than Lilly is.
I'm glad you liked the flashback part. That was, I think, my favorite part to write. It hadn't really occurred to me that she didn't remember, but since they really haven't addressed it on the show, it's not outside the realm of possibility.
Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts!
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Post by TVFan on Apr 27, 2008 17:42:36 GMT -5
I'm glad you decided to add on to this story, cellogal. It certainly worked well as a one-shot, but I like how you've developed it into something more. As was the case with your Scotty chapter, it was nice to get more perspective on the shooting since the show has given us so little (at least on the Scotty/Lilly front). It's very possible that she doesn't remember Scotty being there because she was pretty much in shock at that point.
Lilly is an extremely difficult character to figure out. Even Kathryn Morris has said that she has a hard time with her at times (this is mainly because the higher ups don't give her any backstory on the character, though). So, I am once again impressed with your take on her inner struggles and thoughts. Isn't it funny how she can sort out a cold murder case so easily, and yet, has no idea how to sort out her own life? I think it's entirely possible that Show! Lilly has deeply hidden, repressed feelings for Scotty, but she's such a mess that she can't even see it (it's sorta like that right under your nose thing). Meanwhile, I agree that Show! Scotty has feelings for Lil, but he knows better than to act on them. He wears his heart more on his sleeve, so I've always gotten that impression from him (from the moment he first laid eyes on her in "Love Conquers Al"). I'm really curious to see how you work this out in your next chapter.
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cellogal
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Post by cellogal on Apr 27, 2008 21:55:59 GMT -5
Thanks, TVFan!
Lil IS a tough nut to crack; it just gives me all the more respect for Kathryn in her outstanding portrayal of such a difficult character. Thanks for the encouragement; Lilly chapters/are always tough, but very, very rewarding to write.
I honestly wasn't sure where Lilly was going with this chapter when I sat down to write it. I had no idea about her feelings for Scotty in this story until she realized it herself...so it was definitely an interesting surprise.
Thanks for the encouragement!! It always thrills me when even non-shippers enjoy my shippy stuff. ;D
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cellogal
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Post by cellogal on May 1, 2008 21:23:54 GMT -5
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Post by TVFan on May 1, 2008 22:57:03 GMT -5
Oh no you didn't! You just left us hanging there right as Lil was about to unveil her talk. I really liked this chapter, cellogal. There was a lot of very intriguing self-discovery and reflectiveness in it. I had to laugh at Scotty's casual attitude when he got back from running and found Lil about to leave. It was fun to see her driven so crazy by his fine physique (and it was nice to see it make an appearance once again ). LOVED the part when Scotty woke up and found "a woman" in his bed and immediately began to wonder what he had done in his drunken stuper. Then, he realizes it's Lil and gets worried that they hooked up and he was too drunk to remember. Great stuff! Well written as usual. Can't wait to see what Lil has to say. |
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cellogal
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Post by cellogal on May 2, 2008 0:04:12 GMT -5
Oh no you didn't! You just left us hanging there right as Lil was about to unveil her talk. Yes, I did, because "the talk" is going to be a challenging chapter to write. I think I'm stalling as much as they are. But it's slowly, but surely, taking shape in my head. Why, thank you! It was nice to see it again, wasn't it? I enjoyed Lil's reaction to that part...it was lots of fun to write. This story is a little angstier/quieter than ETTFC, but it was fun to put in a few lighter moments. Considering the talk they're going to have, I think they might be necessary. Yeah, he was fun to write in that scene. Freaking-out hung-over Scotty is interesting, indeed. Why, thank you. I'm glad you enjoyed it. And I can't wait, either. |
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Post by Collider on May 2, 2008 4:46:15 GMT -5
Another well-written chapter. Like you said in your response to TVFan, this is much quieter, I'd say almost gentler, than ETTFC. Different in a lot of ways, yet the love underneath all the thought and the quietude and the gentleness is still the same. They just haven't figured it out yet, which makes all the difference. I loved the shifting perspectives in this one, 'cause your first-person is so phenomenally good anyway, seeing it shift around within the same chapter is an excellent way of reinforcing the difference between your Scotty!POV and your Lilly!POV, and of reminding the readers of just how terrifyingly good you are at both. Utterly adored Drunk!Scotty asking Lil into bed with him - it's such a typically Drunk!Person thing to do, especially when you suddenly find yourself face-to-face with the person you're drinking because of, and absolutely felt like the right thing for him to do in that moment - plus, again, your choice to handle that scene from Lil's perspective stopped that moment from being too introspective and let it just be, which is no doubt how Scotty would've seen it at the time, without the need for you as an author to analyse him over it, 'cept through Lilly's eyes. Also loved the little wake-up scene. Cute and funny, but again believable given the circumstances. And, guh, Scotty's decision to go running. Very metaphorical. I think, though, my favourite part of this is the realisational moments at the end. Lilly convincing herself that it was all in her head - even when she sees him and has Those Thoughts about him - right up till she smells his aftershave on the shirt, and then it all comes flooding back. Very, very telling, and very very believable. And, for Scotty, not even trying to play those mind-games with himself, just accepting it, and seeing her, and trying to rationalise her actions away because he knows it's wrong... and not daring to suspect that she's checking him out and snuck into his apartment and all that stuff because she is maybe thinking all that stuff too. And, yea. Wonderfully believable, for both of them. Weird thing is, as much as this is a little too heavy on the L/S for me (I know, I know, this is me and my huge obssession with ETTFC talkin', when that's ten times shippier than this, but what can I say?), I'm sorta kinda maybe on the edge of my seat waiting for the next chapter. Why do all your fics go and make my brain start sending me mixed signals!? |
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cellogal
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Post by cellogal on May 2, 2008 13:18:36 GMT -5
I loved the shifting perspectives in this one, 'cause your first-person is so phenomenally good anyway, seeing it shift around within the same chapter is an excellent way of reinforcing the difference between your Scotty!POV and your Lilly!POV, and of reminding the readers of just how terrifyingly good you are at both. Wow, thanks!! I'm glad it's working. First-person stories are always hard to write, and I really couldn't decide whose perspective I wanted to tell the rest of the story from. Scotty and Lil sort of made that decision for me! Thanks, dear. That was such a fun scene to write. This one isn't all about the hilarity like ETTFC is, but I was glad to work in some gentle, subtle humor. I'm just glad Lil didn't flip out to see him drunk; I was worried about that. It is, isn't it? Believe it or not, I didn't even think about the metaphor at the time. Wow, thanks! That aftershave just keeps coming in handy!! I'm glad those little moments worked for you...they were sweet to see in my head, and fun to put down on paper. *Evil laugh* My plan is working! Seriously, though, you're being a remarkably good sport, sticking with a blatant shipper fic that doesn't even involve donut wars! I'm impressed, I truly am. Thanks for the review!!! |
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Post by Collider on May 2, 2008 18:43:20 GMT -5
Thanks, dear. That was such a fun scene to write. This one isn't all about the hilarity like ETTFC is, but I was glad to work in some gentle, subtle humor. I'm just glad Lil didn't flip out to see him drunk; I was worried about that. I was half-wondering if she would too... but, then, after the harrowing experience they'd both been through - even without her knowledge of exactly what sparked off the drinking epidemic - it seemed to make sense, so I suppose it's something she'd set aside and accept as just his way of coping with a pretty rough ride. So to speak, ahem. And, since I forgot to mention it when I wrote the review itself... I looooooved how she observed him as being " half drunk", when it was blatant that he was completely smashed. Just one of those adorable moments that made me go "aww" for no apparent reason. It is, isn't it? Believe it or not, I didn't even think about the metaphor at the time. The best symbolic or metaphorical moments come about that way, I find. Nine times out of ten, when I'm working on my fic, the chapters I write with intent to make use of the chapter title in the imagery never work quite as well as the ones I go back to re-read when I've finished writing it, and suddenly realise the imagery worked its way in all by itself without my being aware of it. *Evil laugh* My plan is working! Seriously, though, you're being a remarkably good sport, sticking with a blatant shipper fic that doesn't even involve donut wars! I'm impressed, I truly am. Thanks for the review!!! Oh, it's my pleasure. Yours is one of those compelling writing styles that make it an absolute joy to read, no matter the subject. Naturally, I'd be over the moon if it were all about the Kat/Vera, but your approach with the Lilly/Scotty stuff is just so utterly enjoyable - and your enjoyment of the subject matter, which is to say your love of the characters and the pairing, shines through so clearly in every word - it'd be a crime not to stick with it. |
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cellogal
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Post by cellogal on May 3, 2008 22:10:50 GMT -5
This really is the last chapter, y'all...but it's LONG. I don't know if that's a good thing or not, but I thought I'd warn you in advance. Enjoy! www.fanfiction.net/s/4216144/4/ |
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Post by Collider on May 4, 2008 9:27:32 GMT -5
I'm a bit late to the party on this one... must've completely missed the update when I checked the forum this morning, so sorry 'bout that.
Wow. Just... wow.
Again, the shifting perspective absolutely made this chapter for me... and, again, you've nailed the first-person here, for both of them. The same story can be told two completely different ways by taking two different people's perspective, and you've managed to alternate between both versions without ever convoluting the story itself, which is no mean feat. It flowed wonderfully, and - whenever it switched - it did so with a fluidity that never detached from the storytelling.
Loved the journey you took them through, the way neither of them were willing to be the focus of attention for too long, 'cause that's just who they are, and how they keep bouncing the issues right back at each other... but, at the same time, little by little and piece by piece, ever so slowly bringing out their doubts and their emotions and the angst that makes them tick, and feeding off the other's, because that's just how they work. He gives a little, she takes it and gives a little back... and it shone through wonderfully against the backdrop of the interrogation-style conversation.
And, yea... I'm not a shipper, so I'll hide from most of the shippery stuff... but that little section at the very end absolutely made me sniffle a wee bit. Last two lines were beautiful, and brought about a real sense of completion and... well, sort of fulfilment, in the sense of the emotional rollercoaster they've both just been on. And, while it doesn't quite convince me in the same way that ETTFC does, it was nonetheless just... really sweet. In the purest sense of the word. A lovely culmination and conclusion to a fic that I still can't believe you managed to make four chapters long.
I'm sure you're tired of me saying so, but - as ever - a lovely, lovely piece.
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