2.17: SCHADENFREUDE - Available!

[CC Fan]

Recap Provided By Cellogal

January 2, 1982
The Patrick Brea Salon, which is clearly the see-and-be-seen place, as evidenced by the abundance of wealthy-looking women and free-flowing champagne. As we hear David Bowie/Queen’s “Under Pressure,” an attractive brunette tells her hairdresser that her husband is letting her decorate the house however she wants, since he’s at the hospital all the time anyway. She’s come up with a winning combination: leopard-print furniture, Persian rugs, and Faberge eggs. Oh, honey. Please. Hire someone. A blonde sweeping hair off the floor suggests that she get a neon sign with her name on it and put it in the living room, and, strangely enough, she’s not being sarcastic. My, but the 80s were a disturbing decade. Our erstwhile decorator smiles and tactfully says she was thinking more “classical.” Um, so what, exactly, about leopard print furniture is classical?

The door opens, and the hairdresser tells her client, Lindsay, that her doctor’s here. Lindsay is clearly surprised to see him, and gets up to meet him, where she notices that the aforementioned doctor, her husband, Steven, is sweating and panicky, and she asks if he’s okay. He tells her, without preamble, that Allen died. Lindsay is confused, saying that she thought Steven was going to operate on Allen, and Steven explains that Allen died during surgery, and that things are about to get ugly. Lindsay is shocked, and absently pulls off her smock and hands it to the hairdresser in exchange for her purse. The hairdresser tells Lindsay not to worry about the bill, and she and Steven leave.

At an upscale house, scattered among the Faberge eggs and Persian rugs, Lindsay lies dead on the floor. Her evidence boxes, marked “Closed,” are placed on the shelf.

A rough-looking neighborhood. Lilly heads into a squalid apartment, where Stillman’s finishing up a phone call. She comments that the place looks ransacked, but Stillman tells her it’s “junkie housekeeping.” He then says that the victim is 44-year-old Melanie Cassell, dead of an apparent heroin overdose. Jeffries comments that they’re probably not there because an apartment came on the market. Indeed they are not, as Stillman asks the detectives if they remember the Lindsay Chase murder. Lilly does, of course, and fills us in: Dr. Steven Chase was convicted in 1982 of murdering his wife for the insurance money, and Stillman adds that, during the 23 years Steven has been in prison, he’s told the same story: that he was upstairs, heard a gunshot, and came downstairs to find Lindsay’s body and a shaggy man and blonde woman fleeing the scene. Jeffries adds that no evidence of the pair’s existence was ever found. Stillman then hands Lilly a ring found on Melanie’s body, which contains the inscription, “Dr. Chase, all my love, Lindsay.” Jeffries surmises that this is Steven Chase’s ring, and Stillman pulls back the covers on the bed to show them that the ring ended up on a blonde woman.

Credits.

Evidence warehouse. The detectives are going through Lindsay’s evidence boxes, and Vera complains that one entire box is full of records of “wacked-out” phone calls from helpful citizens saying they saw the Blonde-Shaggy Duo. “Gotta love the specifics,” Jeffries comments. Stillman adds that the jury didn’t buy Steven’s story and convicted him in two hours. Lilly explains that the Chases’ problems began when Steven’s patient, and friend, Allen Moore, died on the table, his widow, Diane, sued the Chases for malpractice, and Steven’s medical license was suspended. Jeffries points out that this meant they lost their income, but that Lindsay had a million-dollar life insurance policy, and wound up dead in her own living room. Lilly says the gun was never found, but Stillman produces a receipt for a .38 purchased by Steven Chase a few months before the murder. Vera wonders how a top-notch surgeon winds up strapped for cash, and Lilly checks the records and learns that they were making $10,000 a month, but spending $14,000. My goodness, that’s a lot of leopard-print furniture and Faberge eggs! Stillman explains that it was the 1980s; “Why save for a rainy day when the sun’s always shining?” Vera asks if the dead junkie from that morning might be half of the Blonde-Shaggy Duo, and Lilly points out that she did end up with the doctor’s ring. Stillman comments that it’s a lousy alibi, but Steven’s been sticking to it for a long time.

Jail. Lilly and Jeffries chat with Steven. Lilly tells him that he was quite the news story in 1982, and Jeffries adds that the city followed the trial like it was a World Series. Steven says it’s called “Schadenfreude,” except I can’t help but notice that he doesn’t pronounce it correctly. Lilly says they’re just dumb cops, so he’ll have to talk down to them, and he explains that “Schadenfreude” is taking pleasure in other people’s misfortune; the higher you fly, the harder you fall. Lilly plays along, saying the rich doctor with a beautiful wife suddenly hits a wall, and Steven finishes the story: now he lives in a box with the scum of society. Jeffries points out that there was also a stack of evidence against him, and Lilly mentions the receipt for the gun. Steven says the gun was for him, that he had dark days. Jeffries asks about the flimsy Blonde-Shaggy alibi, and Steven says if he was lying, he’d have come up with a better story. Lilly shows him a picture of the ring, and he recognizes it as Lindsay’s gift to him when he graduated from medical school, then asks how the detectives got it. They don’t answer. Lilly asks instead about the patient he lost, and Steven explains that Allen and Diane were their best friends, but he made a mistake and changed the course of all their lives. He goes on to say that he couldn’t face Diane and shrank back, but Lindsay didn’t.

Moore home, where Duran Duran’s “Save A Prayer” plays. It’s clearly just after the funeral, as Diane is seen hugging black-clad mourners. Steven and Lindsay walk in, and Steven says they shouldn’t be there. Lindsay disagrees, but Steven protests that he doesn’t even know what to say to Diane. Lindsay’s confident that he will know; that he always does. All the mourners stare as the Chases approach Diane, and Lindsay hugs her and tells her she’s so sorry. Diane demands to know what they’re doing there, and Lindsay says they loved Allen. “You killed him,” Diane points out, looking at Steven. Lindsay protests that it was a horrible accident, but Diane says she’s contacted a lawyer; she wants them to know what it feels like to lose something. Steven finally speaks and says he’s sorry for her loss; Diane says he’ll be sorry for his losses. Steven leaves, and after a moment, Lindsay follows.

Jeffries says this sounds like a threat; Steven protests that Diane was in shock and grieving. Lilly says this is when people sometimes do things they couldn’t normally stomach. Think the writers are trying to explain the behavior of a certain detective? Steven reiterates his Shaggy-Blonde theory, and says that Diane was a brunette. Jeffries says that nobody had motive like Diane, and Steven says it’s not possible, that they weren’t those kind of people. “No one ever is,” Lilly replies.
Moore home. Scotty approaches Diane, who I can’t help but notice is now blonde. “Do I know you?” she asks, the look on her face indicating that she might like to. Scotty introduces himself and compliments her car, and she says it gets her there. He says he’s there about Lindsay Chase’s murder, and Diane laments the fact that poor Steven has been in jail for that for 20 years. “Poor Steven?” Scotty repeats.

Diane says that Steven was a good friend, at one time. Scotty tells her she’s singing a different tune than she was in 1982, that he heard she gave it to them pretty good at Allen’s funeral and sent them away. Diane tells him she was out of her head when she lost Allen couldn’t see past the pain, and wanted the Chases to suffer like she had. Scotty concludes that this explains the lawsuit, and Diane says it broke the Chases: they were cash-poor and couldn’t pay their mortgage. Scotty adds that Steven was depressed, and Diane comments that it was a horror show, and she couldn’t get enough.

Patrick Brea Salon. Manhattan Production Music plays “Still In Pain.” Diane sits in the chair, mid-appointment, when Lindsay walks in. The hairdresser greets Lindsay and asks if she needs a color, and she says she does, but that’s not why she’s there: she’s looking for employment. She says she has no professional experience, but is good with hair and nails. Diane b*tches that she’s got aerobics in 20 minutes, and the hairdresser, Kitty, asks for two seconds. As an aside, why would any sane person get their hair done 20 minutes before an aerobics class? Diane insists that Kitty return to her now, because she’s the one paying her. Kitty pulls Lindsay aside and tells her that the only opening she has is for someone to sweep the hair off the floor, but it’s minimum wage, and it’s her friends’ hair. Lindsay says that they’re not her friends anymore, so she doesn’t mind, and she just needs to make enough for groceries until Steven gets better. Kitty agrees, and welcomes Lindsay, telling her that it’s going to be great. Diane makes a show of shaking the hair off her smock.

Diane says at the time, she enjoyed watching Lindsay suffer, but now she thinks she might have caused her death: that the lawsuit might have driven Steven over the edge.

Squad room. Stillman asks Vera if he’s got any more information on the dead junkie, and Vera summarizes her glorious past: bouncing from job to job, with a few stints in rehab, and no connection to the Chases. He asks if Scotty had better luck, and Stillman fills Vera in on Lindsay’s employment at the salon. Jeffries comes in then, telling them that the IRS has no record of Lindsay’s employment at the Patrick Brea Salon, or anywhere else. The name of the salon rings a bell with Vera, who checks the file again and tells us that Melanie Cassell worked at the same salon at the same time Lindsay did. Jeffries concludes that Lindsay and the blonde junkie were co-workers.

Patrick Brea Salon, which is now Katarine’s Salon and Day Spa. Lilly and Jeffries ask for Kitty Shaw, and she’s there, but goes by Katarine now, figuring that if she upgraded the name, the rest would follow. It seems to have worked. Lilly and Jeffries say they’re there about Lindsay Chase’s murder, and Kitty ushers them into her office. They ask if she knew Melanie Cassell, and Kitty remembers her from, “like, a million years ago,” then asks why. They fill her in: that Melanie’s dead of a heroin overdose, and they’re taking another look at Lindsay’s murder. Kitty’s confused, remembering Steven’s conviction. The detectives ask about the lack of employment records, and Kitty confirms that Melanie and Lindsay both worked at the salon, but were paid under the table. Kitty reminisces that Melanie and Lindsay were a culture clash. Jeffries asks if Melanie didn’t appreciate the extra help with the broom, but Kitty says she didn’t think Melanie viewed Lindsay as a helpful presence in her life.

Nightclub, where we hear .38 Special’s “Caught Up In You.” Lindsay’s doing shots, and Kitty comes up to the table with a fresh drink and asks her if she feels better. Lindsay apologizes, saying that Kitty probably had other plans, and that she didn’t mean to cry at work. Kitty says she’d cry, too, if her super-hunk hubby was depressed and in bed all day. Lindsay also laments that she thought eight hours would add up to more than the pile of cash on the table, which she seems intent on spending in that one night. Kitty encourages her, telling her Steven will pull through, that he has a million reasons to get out of bed in the morning, including Lindsay.

Melanie and a twerpy-looking guy approach the table, and Melanie complains that she wanted to sit at the bar. Timmy asks Kitty if her conversation with Lindsay is a “girl thing,” but Lindsay invites him to sit down. Melanie isn’t thrilled with this development, but joins them anyway. Kitty introduces Timmy and Lindsay reluctantly, and Timmy’s seen Lindsay before, but noticed that she’s not driving the Beemer anymore. Melanie takes some pleasure in pointing out that the Beemer got repossessed, and Timmy tells Lindsay that if she’s having money problems, the hair-sweeping job isn’t going to cut it, but he knows about other stuff, real stuff. Lindsay’s intrigued, but Kitty shushes him, telling him that Lindsay’s not like that. Timmy protests that he knows Lindsay’s classy, and she doesn’t have to point it out. He makes eyes at Lindsay, and Melanie notices this and demands to leave. When Timmy doesn’t hop to it, she sticks a piece of paper into the candle on the table and lights it on fire, then throws it at Timmy’s feet and runs off. He calls her a psycho and runs off after her, and Kitty puts the fire out with her glass of water.

Lilly concludes that Melanie didn’t like her boyfriend making eyes at Lindsay, but Jeffries says it sounds like Melanie wasn’t too crazy about Lindsay even before that. Kitty says that Melanie thought Lindsay was lording her status over them, but it wasn’t like that. Lilly asks if Kitty knows where Timmy ended up, and she gives many possibilities, including jail, a halfway house, or something similarly sensational, then asks Lilly if she’s ever thought about doing a rinse. Jeffries looks on in amusement as Lilly says she has. Kitty fingers a lock of Lilly’s hair and tells her she could go copper, that she has the skin for it. Copper? Lilly says she’ll think about it.

PPD. Stillman’s on the elevator, and Scotty hops in just before the door closes, telling Stillman he found Timmy. Stillman asks how Timmy looks, and Scotty replies that he looks pretty shaggy, plus, he has three meth convictions. “A three-time loser with a blonde girlfriend,” Stillman observes, and Scotty adds that the girlfriend hated Lindsay Chase. As they get off the elevator, Stillman tells Scotty to go pick up Timmy, then stops him and hands him a business card for a grief counselor. Scotty tries to give it back, saying he doesn’t need that, and Stillman points out that Scotty never talks about it. Scotty replies that he does better not talking. Stillman shrugs and tells Scotty to throw it away, then, and Scotty sighs and rolls his eyes as he heads for his locker.

Low-rent neighborhood. Scotty and Vera get out of the car and find Timmy, who’s now washing windshields for a living. He announces that he hasn’t done anything wrong, that he’s sober except for beer. Scotty frisks him as Vera sarcastically asks if he’s making a living with his Windex, and Timmy replies that regular jobs took too much out of him. Scotty tells him to see what he can muster up for this, then asks about Lindsay Chase. Vera reminds him that he and Melanie knew her, and Scotty points out that he and Melanie fit the Blonde-Shaggy Duo description.

Timmy protests that he and Lindsay were friends. “Is that what you call girls you had a mission to bang?” Vera asks. Hee. Timmy insists the sparks were mutual, but Scotty says that’s not how they heard it. The detectives remind him that Melanie hated Lindsay for acting like she was better than they were, and theorize that perhaps he killed Lindsay to make it up to Melanie. Timmy argues that he and Lindsay had a true bond, that she came to him for help, wanting to know how to make money, and that he told her all he needed was a place to cook.

Chase home. The kitchen has become a full-fledged meth lab, and we’re serenaded by Billy Idol’s “Dancing With Myself.” Lindsay looks on nervously, no doubt wondering what meth fumes will do to her designer kitchenware. She complains that the house smells like pee and that Steven will be home tomorrow, and Kitty reassures her that they’ll roast coffee grounds to cover it up.

Hmmm...coffee grounds + pee: sounds like the guys’ wing of my dorm in college. Timmy has some very expensive looking utensils, and Lindsay worriedly protests that those were wedding gifts. “They work good,” Timmy replies. Heh. Melanie saunters up wearing Steven’s ring, proudly proclaiming that she’s a doctor’s wife. Lindsay protests that it’s Steven’s ring, but it doesn’t fit anymore since he gained weight, and Kitty orders Melanie to put the ring back. Melanie argues that Kitty’s wearing Lindsay’s shirt, but Kitty retorts that the shirt was a gift, not a theft. Melanie pouts and puts the ring down, and Kitty tells Lindsay that this is their last cookout, that it’s not right cooking meth in her nice house. Lindsay looks like there’s no way in heck she’s going to argue with that. Kitty and Melanie leave, Melanie stealing the ring on the way out, and then Timmy whispers excitedly that “he’s here.” A guy in a leather jacket and slicked-back hair comes in through the back door and examines their product, then says he only needs half. Lindsay protests that that’s only $3,000. Timmy tries to shush her. Leather Jacket, clearly not used to hearing “no,” tells her that it’s $2,500 now. Lindsay refuses, and Timmy tries to shush her again, but Lindsay’s not backing down. She insists to Leather Jacket that he take the whole batch and pay her $6,000, because a deal’s a deal. Well, yes, in the civilized world. Leather Jacket tells her he could kill her right now and take the whole batch for nothing, but this doesn’t faze Lindsay a bit. She tells him to take the deal or leave her house.

Timmy tells the detectives that he’d never seen anything like it, since nobody stood up to Mike. He tells them that Lindsay was curious about the “big money things” Mike was into: insurance fraud, money laundering, and a host of other wholesome hobbies. Vera asks if Mike and Lindsay ever met again, and Timmy says she’d be dead if they did. Um, Timmy? She kind of is. Scotty points this out, and Timmy gives them an alarmed glance.

PPD kitchen. Lilly and Jeffries tell Stillman about Lindsay’s downward slide, and Stillman and Vera theorize that this is why Lindsay didn’t tell Steven about the salon job: she didn’t want him to know about the new company she was keeping. Stillman asks if Lindsay’s slide might have ended with Mike Dougherty, and Vera says that Mike has no record. Jeffries and Lilly explain that it was all under the table: insurance scams, with the occasional meth deal on the side. Stillman asks what Mike’s up to these days, and Vera answers that he owns a home security business. Well, that’s comforting. Stillman observes that Mike’s moved up in the world. “And put his cat burglar skills to use,” Lilly comments. Vera takes off, saying he and Scotty are going to go talk to Mike, and Lilly wonders aloud why Kitty never mentioned the meth deal. Jeffries agrees. “You’d think cooking drugs with Williams-Sonoma would ring some bells,” he observes. Heh.

[TVFan]

Street. Vera and Scotty walk along, and Vera complains that he can’t feel his face. Scotty reaches into his pocket and pulls out…holy crap, is that a FLASK? Sure enough, it is. Sigh. He hands it to Vera, with an explanation that Southern Comfort will melt it right off. Oh, Scotty.

Vera asks after Scotty’s barmaid, and Scotty gives Vera the stink-eye and asks if he’s going to henpeck now, too. Hey, Scotty? Right now, I don’t think “henpeck” is severe enough. Try “dope slap.” Vera tells him that he waved the red flag once, and if Scotty doesn’t heed, it ain’t his worry, and then takes a swig from the flask. Oh, Vera. You were the Voice of Reason a few weeks ago, and now you’re drinking on the job? Bad Vera! Scotty says Chris keeps him guessing, and Vera asks, incredulously, if Chris isn’t just a move for him. Scotty says that no, she’s not, but then looks less certain, and says he doesn’t know, and then that he doesn’t think so, then chugs his Southern Comfort. Vera suggests that he might want to figure that out. Yeah, okay. Let’s bypass the Unresolved Mourning problem and the Drinking On Duty problem and go straight to the heart of the matter: defining the relationship with Chris. Yeah, that’ll work.

Mike’s store. Scotty notes, with wry amusement, that the security systems are really just deadbolts and chains, but Mike argues that they keep the bad guys out. Vera points out that Mike would know, and Mike doesn’t get his meaning. Scotty asks Mike if his customers know they’re being protected by a criminal, and Mike protests that he’s never been arrested in his life. Vera asks about Lindsay Chase. Mike recites the story he read in the papers, that her husband killed her and blamed druggie intruders, but Scotty reminds him that he had a closer seat than that. The detectives share Timmy’s story with him, how he threatened Lindsay over a meth deal. Mike calls it negotiating, but Scotty disagrees, saying “I could kill you right now” sounds kinda like a threat to him. Mike argues that Lindsay wasn’t afraid of him, or else she wouldn’t have invited him back to her house, alone. Vera suggests that they talk about that, and Mike remembers that Lindsay had guts.

Chase home, where Master Source plays “All Night.” Mike is strolling around with Lindsay, checking out her décor. No, really. He’s actually looking at her furnishings, specifically this really ugly stone Fu Dog statue. He asks if it’s real; she says they got it in Shanghai. He notices a painting on the wall, but Lindsay says he can’t have that; it was painted by Steven’s great-grandfather, who was a turn-of-the-century watercolorist, as a wedding gift. Mike asks if grandpa was famous; Lindsay replies that experts know him, but Mike can’t have it because it has sentimental value. He notices her reluctance and tells her that if she doesn’t want to do this, she should just sell the house, but Lindsay protests that she can’t, that Steven would fall apart. Mike goes over the plan again: he’ll call from a convenience store, ring twice, and hang up. That’s her five-minute warning for her to get upstairs and turn out all the lights. The next morning, she’s to call the cops, but wait six months to collect the insurance money. Lindsay protests that they can’t wait that long, but Mike says she doesn’t want to look needy. She says she is needy, but he insists, and she reluctantly agrees. He goes on to say that they split the insurance money and then he sells the stuff for cash, which he keeps, and then oozes closer to her, telling her she’s high maintenance and he needs a bonus. She balks, telling him he can have the stuff, but “not this,” and he responds with, “No this, no deal.” Lindsay storms off.

Mike explains that Lindsay buttoned up, so no sale. Scotty finds it hard to believe that Mike just let that happen, but Mike says he had thirty other deals going and didn’t need her. Vera’s not buying this, reminding him that Lindsay got him all worked up and then walked away, but he replies that nobody gets him all worked up. Scotty’s still skeptical, pointing out the coincidence that Lindsay died a week later. Mike says he wasn’t thinking about her a week later, that she wasted enough of his time.

Katarine’s salon. Lilly sits in the chair as Kitty searches through some hair color swatches, and Lil says that she still can’t get used to fifty bucks for a haircut; even though she makes a living, she still hates spending money. Kitty says that’s not her case, that as soon as she quit just scraping by, she spent like it was her job. She then holds a swatch of the most hideously putrid purplish-copper I’ve ever seen up to Lilly’s face and tells her to look at herself. Lilly does, takes the swatch, and mercifully lowers it with a slight laugh, then asks Kitty how come she never said anything about Lindsay and the meth. Kitty sighs, apparently realizing that she won’t get to dye Lilly’s hair after all, and says it was because Lindsay was her friend and she was protecting her. Lilly asks how that works, and Kitty says that Lindsay was ashamed of her desperation and wouldn’t want her friends to know that she’d stooped to letting a bunch of cretins cook meth in her kitchen. Lilly says she’s not judging, that Lindsay was a good person in a tough spot, and Kitty says she might as well tell Lilly the worst: that she stooped even lower than that. Lilly asks if this involved Mike, and Kitty says it involved Timmy. He was tripping over himself to get with Lindsay, she says, and Lindsay took advantage of that because she needed someone to help her with her plan.

Nightclub. We hear Tommy TuTone’s “867-5309,” which will be stuck in my head for the rest of the night. Lindsay, wearing what I have to say is a very cool dress, saunters up to Timmy and starts dancing and flirting with him, telling him that people underestimate him: that he’s sweet, fun, and smart. Timmy is buying this hook, line, and sinker, and tells Lindsay that she’s sexy. She sits down next to him and tells him that she needs smart. Kitty walks in and asks what’s going on; Timmy says they’re just talking and tells her to beat it. Kitty asks where Melanie is, and he replies that she’s at her cousin’s funeral, then tells her to butt out. Lindsay asks him to go get some more peanuts, and he eagerly agrees and takes off.

Kitty asks Lindsay what she’s doing. Lindsay calls it hanging with Timmy, Kitty calls it shaking her ass for him. Tomato, tomahto. Kitty asks Lindsay what’s going on, and Lindsay tearfully reminds Kitty of how Mike’s plan fell through. Kitty protests that it fell through because Lindsay wouldn’t give it up for him, and reassures her that refusing Mike was the right thing. Lindsay continues, saying she wants to go ahead with the plan, but with someone she can control, then starts to cry. Kitty lifts Lindsay’s chin and tells her that that isn’t the kind of people they are, that they’re above working it for twerps like Timmy, then encourages her to hang in there. Lindsay tells Kitty that Steven loves the song “Don’t Stop Thinkin’ About Tomorrow,” and Kitty says the song is true, and that that’s what she wants to hear from Lindsay.

“Fresh nuts,” Timmy announces, as he returns with the peanuts, and Kitty tells him to take a hike. Timmy tells Kitty she’s out of line, then appeals to Lindsay, demanding that she tell Kitty that there are sparks, and that he’s not making it up. Lindsay won’t even look at him. Ooooh, denied. Timmy storms off in a huff.

Lilly concludes that Timmy got rejected by Lindsay hours before she died, and Kitty confirms it, saying that Timmy was dreaming; that Lindsay was way out of his league. Lilly suspects that he lashed out at her for sending him away, then asks Kitty how he took Lindsay’s death. Kitty has no idea; she says that he and Melanie split and he never showed his face at the bar again.

McGinty’s. Dave Feldstein, Scott Nickoley, and Jamie Dunlap play “Wish I Never Met You,” which is a very cool song. Scotty and Christina have swapped places, with him pouring the drinks and her sitting on the barstool, for a game of “I Never,” which I must admit “I never” heard of before this episode. Does that mean I drink, or not? I’m confused. Anyway, Scotty announces that he never downed so much booze he forgot where he was, and Chris chugs her shot, and tells him he doesn’t want to play “I Never” with her. I don’t doubt it, but he continues, saying he never stole liquor from his employer after-hours, then takes a drag from Chris’s cigarette. Good Lord, Scotty, what are you DOING? Scotty goes on to announce that he never caused complications for himself just ‘cause of some guy. Well, that’s good to know. “Worth it,” Chris replies, before she downs her drink. Umm…I’m not familiar with the rules of “I Never,” but I think she should drink at least two shots for that, because I know of at least twice in her life when she’s done exactly that.

The conversation takes a nauseating turn then, as Chris says she never checked her cell phone ten times in an hour hoping someone had called. Scotty asks what kind of someone. “Complicated,” she replies. Scotty smiles, and she drinks. He pours another shot and tells her he never pictured someone so vivid from the night before that he missed his stop and went five miles out of his way before he realized it. Oh, now, this is just unnecessary. “You ain’t sick of me?” Chris asks. Well, I don’t know about Scotty, but I know I sure am. Sadly, she’s not interested in my opinion, and to my chagrin, Scotty tells her it feels like she just got here. He leans in to kiss her then, but realizes, in his addled state, that the bar is in the way. He smacks it with both hands, then comes around it and starts making out with Chris. Okay, children; let’s review. Drinking on the job and banging your partner’s sister are NOT acceptable substitutes for grief counseling. Are we clear on that? Okay, good. Then let’s move on.

Interview room. Lilly reminds Timmy that Lindsay shut him down, and Vera adds that he can’t stand a tease; that if you go down the road, you should deliver. Lilly asks if Timmy told her his terms, he denies it. Vera jokes that a high-class lady like Lindsay would have laughed in his face, and that she denied about the sparks. “In front of her friend,” Timmy protests. Lilly asks if something happened when Kitty wasn’t around, and Timmy tells her that he and Lindsay were confidantes, that she told him how it really was in the big fancy house: all roses on the outside, crying on the inside. Lilly asks about what; and Timmy reveals that Steven Chase was cheating on Lindsay with her friend, “some Diane girl.” Lilly’s ears perk up, and she asks Timmy if he’s sure. He is. Vera and Lilly conclude that this puts a new spin on Diane’s husband dying on Steven’s table.

Jail. Lilly’s waxing philosophical with Steven, telling him she’s figured out his philosophy of life: It’s his world, she says, and we’re just living in it. She then tells him she knows about the affair with Diane. Steven admits it, and she points out that he omitted that part. Steven sarcastically wonders why, and Lilly theorizes that his motive was to get rid of Allen and Lindsay to clear the way for him and Diane. Steven says it happened, but he didn’t plan it. Lilly presses him, saying two dead people sounds pretty convenient, and Steven gets what he wants: Diane. Steven protests that Allen dying ruined his life, and Lilly says this is because she turned on him, and the jury didn’t buy his lame story and sent him away forever, to a place where the world didn’t revolve around him. Steven says the affair was nothing, but Lilly argues that it hurt Lindsay enough to bring it up to a virtual stranger: Timmy, a loser to the core who loved Lindsay. Steven protests that he was the one who loved Lindsay. “Nothing says that sweeter than bangin’ her friend,” is Lilly’s reply. Oooh, burn. Steven blames the indulgent, selfish times for his misdeeds, and Lilly’s unsympathetic, telling him that while he was being selfish and indulgent, Lindsay was trying to make ends meet by selling drugs and arranging an insurance scam. Steven doesn’t believe this, but Lilly says Lindsay was desperate to save him. Steven says that means they both hit their lowest point, but that was when they found each other again.

Chase home. Lindsay comes in from her night out to find Steven sitting in the dark holding a gun. He says he ruined their lives. She asks what he’s doing, and he asks her who she’s dressed like that for, and wonders if she’s seeing someone. She says she’s not, and tells him to give her the gun, but he ignores her and says he wouldn’t blame her. Lindsay asks for the gun again, and Steven tells her that without him, she could get her life back. She tells him that this is her life, and he finally gives her the gun. They’re both crying now, and she tells him that she misses him, and that if he leaves, she doesn’t know what will happen to her, that she’s been so lost and wants to get away from there. Steven agrees and caresses her face, then tells her that they’ll sell the house and leave, and she says she just wants to be with him. They kiss, and then the phone rings. He asks her to come upstairs with him, but she turns toward the phone in alarm when it stops after two rings. She tells him to go, and she’ll be right there. They exchange “I love yous,” and then he goes upstairs.

Steven says he was upstairs when he heard the shot: “End of Lindsay, and me.” Lilly’s wheels are turning, and she asks him if he’s sure the phone rang twice. He asks what that means.

Interview room. Scotty and Jeffries are in there with Mike, and Scotty reminds Mike of the two rings-and-hang-up arrangement. Mike retorts that the deal was off, and Jeffries asks him why they have a phone call from a nearby convenience store minutes before Lindsay’s death. “You tell me,” Mike replies. Jeffries says that his plan was in motion, and doesn’t quite believe that Mike wasn’t a part of it. Mike hopes they have more than a phone call, and Scotty asks if they’re wasting his time. Mike asks again if the phone call is all they have, and Scotty answers that it’s not: that they were just wasting their time digging in Mike’s finances. Jeffries says that they learned that Mike’s business has been receiving regular payments from Katarine’s salon since the early 80s. Yup, that’s more than a phone call. Jeffries and Scotty wonder aloud why Kitty would be making payments to Mike. Scotty asks if Mike and Kitty are secretly family, and Mike says he’s not talking. Jeffries says that’s fine, they’ll just go talk to Kitty, which should be pretty easy. “You know how these hairdressers are: talk, talk, talk,” Scotty comments as he starts to leave, and Mike stops them. He says he was there, but he didn’t kill Lindsay, and he has the gun with Kitty’s prints on it; this is why she pays him, he says. Jeffries concludes that Kitty must have been the blonde.

Chase home. Mike and Kitty, who’s wearing a blonde wig, enter through the back door, and he tells her to keep a lookout. Lindsay comes in and demands to know what Mike is doing there, since the plan is off, and then is shocked to see Kitty. Kitty tells her to go upstairs, that she and Mike can take care of things and then she’ll get her money. Lindsay says she doesn’t want to do this anymore, but Kitty says she took care of it. Mike gripes that this is a mess, and Kitty pulls Lindsay aside, telling her that she gave Mike what he wanted, so it’s all set. Lindsay asks why she’d do that, and Kitty says, “Well, duh,” it’s for her, for her better tomorrows. She then asks if Lindsay likes her Stevie Nicks wig, and Lindsay rightly asks if Kitty’s crazy. Kitty reminds Lindsay that she’s the one who talked about the song. Lindsay says Steven’s upstairs and begs them to just leave, and Mike complains again that this is way too sloppy. Kitty asks Lindsay why she’s angry, when she’s doing this as Lindsay’s friend. Lindsay protests that this is crazy, that she was crazy for suggesting it, and she’s not like this. “And I am,” Kitty concludes bitterly. Lindsay doesn’t answer, and Kitty guesses she is like this. Lindsay says they’re selling the house and moving, and tells the pair to just go. Kitty sees the gun lying on the end table and picks it up, points it at Lindsay, and says she thought she was Lindsay’s closest friend. Mike orders Kitty to put the gun down, and Lindsay is shocked. Kitty just wants to know if they were ever really friends, if Lindsay even cared, and Lindsay says, in effect, yeah, sure, whatever, just get out of my house. This answer apparently doesn’t satisfy Kitty, because she fires a single shot and Lindsay falls. Steven calls for her from upstairs, and Mike and Kitty disappear through the door, and we see their exit from Steven’s perspective. What do you know, that Blonde-Shaggy theory was actually true! He rushes to Lindsay’s side and kneels over her body, and we get a few parting shots of Lindsay’s “classical” décor as the camera retreats.

Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believing” starts up as Scotty escorts Mike to jail. In Mike’s office, CSU opens the safe, and Vera reaches in to find a gun sealed in a plastic bag.

Timmy cleans a windshield, then wipes his forehead as he watches the car drive away.

Lilly and Jeffries arrest Kitty and lead her out of the salon to a waiting car. Well, on the plus side, if anyone in jail needs a rinse, Kitty’s their woman! Leaving the salon, Lilly sees Lindsay standing across the street. She gives Lilly a very slight smile before disappearing.

Diane picks up her morning paper and reads the headline that Steven Chase is innocent. She looks shocked. We cut from a newspaper photo of Steven’s release to the actual scene, where the guards hand Steven a bag of his belongings and shake his hand. He walks out a free man and sees Lilly waiting for him. He waves to her and shakes her hand. She gives him back his ring, and he takes it and walks out to freedom.